How You Speak About Yourself Has Power Over Your Life

Have you ever said unattractive words or names about yourself? You are out with friends and make self-deprecating jokes about yourself or describe yourself with negative limiting words.

Maybe you were lucky, and a friend reached out, saying, “I don’t know if you’re aware of the way you speak about yourself, but spoken words have more power than you realize. What you speak, your life expresses.”

Like most people, you may not realize it, but your words affect every area of your life and can impact you each day and for years to come.

Your Words Affect Your Confidence

When you feel good about yourself, you may use encouraging words to describe yourself. You focus on self-care and feel proud of yourself if you have mastered a complex project that you worked hard on. You may give yourself an internal “you did great” moment.

Though are those moments rare? Are your internal thoughts negative, as you constantly look for flaws in yourself? If so, self-judging negative words affect your confidence and reduce your well-being.

Your Words Impact Your Attitude

Your internal and external words can impact the result beforehand when you approach a big project or tackle a difficult conversation. For example, if you say that you’re headed back to the salt mines before you go to work on your novel, you’re going to associate the task with boredom and drudgery.

But if you say that you’re off to work on the exciting adventure that is your novel, you’re more likely to approach your writing session with energy and enthusiasm. No guarantee that everything you create during that session will be gold. However, you’re more likely to be happy with your work and enjoy the process if you approach it with the right attitude.

Your Words Create Your Level of Success

Have you tried something new and failed because you set yourself up for defeat? For example, you want to go back to school but immediately see all the negative issues around doing what you want.

But you find yourself saying things like, “I’m not smart enough to handle the workload” or “I don’t have the brains in the family.”

Fortunately, you have the opportunity to catch yourself in self-defeating talk and reframe your choice of words. Your words create your level of success in your life. If you speak as though you’re not going to finish your degree, you will believe that truth and live it out — even if you don’t want to.

The words you speak dictate your level of success — whether in your work, your relationships, or your hobbies. You can only go as far as you believe possible in life and business.

Your Words Can Heal Your Self-Image

Here is when words help you heal when so many challenges have depleted your ability to feel you have value to offer.

What if you didn’t have support growing up, maybe physically or emotionally abused, or abandoned by parents. Maybe the upbringing wasn’t as challenging, but it left you with low self-esteem and feeling unworthy.

Everyone has many experiences in life — a bunch of broken expectations, as well as experiences that have added glue to our lives. Whether we are aware or not, we create a mosaic in our lives. Our beautiful life mosaic included many facets in our lives to create something beautiful.   It is who we are.

Become aware of your words as you choose either rocks or beautiful stones in your life mosaic – it’s your masterpiece, which you continuously create.

Your Words Create Habits

So here is a universal issue for so many people. We tend to put labels on ourselves, creating our habits. For example, do you say things that include:

  • I always overeat.
  • I can’t be on time to save my life.
  • I never make it to the gym.
  • I don’t know how to manage money
  • I’m not good at communicating with others

If you use labels to describe yourself, you may want to create new habits and reframe your words to express yourself. When you say one of the sentences above, you can replace it with a different one like:

  • I’m learning self-control when it comes to portions.
  • I’m working to leave the house 10 minutes early.
  • I make the gym a priority.
  • I’m taking the time to learn how to manage my money
  • I’m practicing ways to communicate clearly with others

The more you focus and practice changing your words, the more you increase your ability to change.

Your Words Produce Peace & Calm

Your words have a profound effect on your emotional state, too. Using certain words can alter your perception of events. For example, you could say, “I’m furious that my food is cold.”

With this statement, you’re focusing on a strong emotion (fury) over a minor problem that doesn’t entirely deserve this reaction. But what would happen if you changed your words? You could say, “I’m annoyed that my food is cold.”

The verbs you choose in your conversation impact your emotions. If you prefer mild words, you’re less likely to blow up over something seemingly small (like cold food).

Your Words Give You Space to Grow

It’s easy to talk about yourself in absolutes that don’t leave you open to new possibilities. For example, what if you want to grow your business and find yourself struggling with it.   You say, “I’ll never be able to grow this business.”

Never is a long time. Are you sure you want to apply that word to your situation?

Negative absolutes (like never and always) can leave you feeling trapped and defeated when you use them. If you find yourself saying them a lot, pause and ask yourself. “Is this a statement that I want to be true about my life or business?”

If you genuinely want to grow into your best self, you must be willing to give up the spoke mindsets that hold you back. That means making friends with your inner trickster (also known as ego). Thank her for her input, then suggest that she sit down quietly because you have work to do.

Your Words Determine the Results You Get

Your words create your reality. They also determine the results you get. If you go into a situation thinking you will fail or not get what you want, the chances are high that you will. It doesn’t matter that you put in the effort to make it happen, yet you bring with you the belief that it will not work out.

Your mind is incredibly powerful. It manifests what you say, regardless of whether what you said was positive or negative. You will always experience the outcomes you predict, even when they’re painful.

However, there is some good news. You can change the results you get and your experiences by changing your words. If you approach the next situation with confidence and work hard to make it happen, you have a better chance of making it a reality. Why? Because you believed it was possible, your mind went to work manifesting it.

Your Words to Express External Situations

Things happen in the outside world, and they can impact our world. Yet, the words you use to describe what happened to you either take up so much of your energy or you can decide to diminish the outside world’s impact on you. It still happens, yet you can choose to react strongly or respond to the situation – which will support your well-being. Your choice!!!

Your Thoughts

Your words are your most powerful resource. They can be a weapon you use to hurt yourself and cut down your potential. Or they can be a fantastic tool you can harness to create more of what you want in your life and business.

Where do you stand with the words you use to describe yourself – do they diminish or support you?

Ask yourself if your best friend would say the same things about you?

Women’s Group Topics

We all journey on the self-judgment road, though do we have a friend to let us know that we don’t have to go down that road? Discuss how you can help each other choose paths that support each person’s well-being.


Be well,

“To fully enjoy the ‘richness’ of our lives, we need to stop long enough to visit with ourselves.”
(Pat Brill)

Other Topics You May Be Interest In
How to Live with “Not Knowing”
Do You Take the Time to Listen to Yourself?
The Benefits of Journaling





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