I’ve been thinking lately about how I, and often my friends around me, search for ways where we are not lovable. We recognize all the areas of our life that we are not doing our best. What if we decide to start searching and stepping into our lovable parts?
Let’s step into areas where you are busy judging yourself.
- How many times have you felt unlovable, and it was impossible for another person to love you truly? If they only knew what you knew.
- How have the harsh experiences impacted how you feel about yourself?
- How often do you rehash your mistakes?
- How often have you judged yourself in the last week because you didn’t take care of everything on your To-Do list?
- Do you feel you never follow through on what you know is good for you?
Why do we choose to be self-critical?
If you research this topic, you will read about the overriding reason people judge themselves – low self-esteem.
- Judging yourself is your comfort zone, and it takes effort to challenge your inner beliefs regarding the value we offer.
- Life experiences happen, and how you decide to interpret them can create a self-critical belief. Many can be painful, and you don’t see a way out of the negative thoughts that impact your beliefs about yourself.
- We all make mistakes, as that is part of being human. Release yourself from holding on to your mistakes and feeling shameful about what you did, and instead, ask yourself how you can learn from the experience. There is a reason we did what we did, and step back from self-judgment and move towards self-awareness.
- Most of us fear rejection, so we can reject ourselves before someone else, even though we do not know they will reject us. It can all be in our minds.
- Insecurity rides along many of our inner thoughts, yet most of the time, our thoughts are made up of fear.
How about taking a journey on the “lovable” road?
- Let go of being a critic and instead create more time appreciating what you bring to the world around you. We all have inner beauty, and surfacing up that beauty increases a more lovable you. What do you value about yourself?
- Think about your thoughts – would you think or tell others what you say to yourself? For example, “that was a stupid thing to do.” I know I would NOT say that to others, but I catch myself saying that to me.
- Treat yourself with respect and expect others to do so as well. Becoming self-aware of how you treat yourself and others towards you will guide you to a more lovable you.
- Expect the love you deserve by providing yourself with your inner love.
- Forgiveness, compassion, and what you choose to believe about yourself is your choice.
- Let go of fear and resentment, as this will give you more inner room for self-love.
Where do you feel unlovable? Does it impact your relationships? Unlovable connects to “not good enough.” Are you open to discovering a more lovable you?
Women’s Group Topic
Gather together and share how you judge yourself. Write it down, and you may see that others in the group may share your inner beliefs. Then take the time to re-frame those thoughts with what you have learned, how you have changed, and how you want to create an “inner lovable” journey in your life.
“To fully enjoy the ‘richness’ of our lives, we need to stop long enough to visit with ourselves.”
Other Topics You May Be Interested In
Do you Over-Apologize?
Our Power in Life is Choice
9 Questions to Ask Yourself
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