Do you complain about many minor issues and continue to tolerate those annoyances. How often are your thoughts bogged down with negative thinking throughout the day, or do you tell someone else about a situation, people, or things you are annoyed with or wished were different?
Are you aware of the energy you give to everyday annoyances?
Have you thought about not being annoyed in your life?
All those annoying thoughts, issues with people, and things do not go away if we keep doing the same thing; instead, they seep deeper into your energy source and deplete you of a vital life force. Learning how to handle everyday annoyances that grab your energy — is a skill you can learn by listening and choosing to do something different.
I don’t know about you, but no one taught me how to problem-solve – that I could handle annoyances differently. Either I walked away or tolerated the situation. It does seem like a potential solution, except that I took the hassle with me.
Let’s Step Back and Reflect
- Think about all the little things you complain about each day or week. Is there a theme or consistency around what you are not happy about in your life?
- Recognize your annoyances – no judgments; instead, you want to create self-awareness to support your well-being.
- Do you tolerate annoyances because you feel you cannot change them or take too much energy to change them? Or maybe you don’t know what to do.
- Do you go on automatic pilot whenever you face an annoyance and replicate your normal behaviors around the situation?
- Do you feel you can change how you think or feel about what is annoying you?
- Are you willing to discuss with another person about what is annoying you?
- Are you willing to let go of the expectation that something or someone should be different?
- If you thought that there were options available to you, would you change your behavior?
- Are your annoyances impacting others?
Listening to yourself gives you the tools to solve issues and increase your energy. You can make choices and not feel helpless or overwhelmed. Listening opens the door to potential possibilities to enhance your well-being. Keep in mind that annoyances take away your energy.
Listening is a skill, which means you can learn it.
An Everyday Annoyance
How often have you waited online and got annoyed, wanting to move forward quickly, as you have so many things you need to do and cannot do anything about it? Maybe you stamped your feel, breathed heavily, or complained out loud. It is an annoyance that all of us have experienced at some time.
I spent most of my life in the New York City area, and impatience is a New York trait. We are so busy rushing, or there are so many people, the annoyance of waiting in line creeps into our everyday life. Yet what can we do about the problem? There are many options to release the tension in our heads and bodies while waiting in line. If we stop and listen to our annoyance, maybe we could make other decisions:
- We can talk to someone in front or behind us.
- Always carry a notepad around to capture what you want to do or ideas around your work or writing.
- Check your email
- Reach out to a friend via email or text.
- Take slow deep breaths, enjoying the moment and that you are alive.
- Or stand there and release the need to have it be different than it is.
Annoyances with Partners/Family Members
Family can bring out the stash of annoyances we harbor within ourselves. So how do we handle everyday problems with people close to us?
- Before acting on an annoyance with someone close to you, step back and review how you feel. Are you irritable because you are tired, hungry, frustrated about something at work, or stressed dealing with a lot in your life?
- Remember, it’s your annoyance, and you need to take ownership of it and not pretend it belongs to someone annoying you. It’s your feelings. Even if the other person is doing something to annoy us intentionally, it’s still your feeling.
- Look at what is annoying you – should you discuss it when you are annoyed or wait until later when you calm down, and your perspective and energy around the issue have lessened.
- Can you schedule a time to speak with the person when you are calm? Use “I” statements and not “you” statements if you want the person to listen to you.
- If you are picking at lots of little things bothering you about the person, step back and figure out the main issue because the little things block the real issue, and you will never be able to solve it if you don’t know what is bothering you.
Tools to Handle Everyday Annoyances
Do deep breathing
- Take three long, slow deep breaths in and out and more if needed. Your body releases tension when you do deep breathing. You can do it for 1 minute and see what happens.
- If someone annoys you, nothing big, maybe they chew their gum loudly or talk loudly, or any other potential annoying behavior. Go into yourself and breath and release, focusing on your well-being
- What if you are annoyed because the boss changed the direction of a project or wanted it sooner than you anticipated. Go in and breathe deeply, telling yourself life changes, and you will do your best.
Recognize when you are most likely to become annoyed
- Are you hungry or tired?
- Too much caffeine
- Sitting too long without moving
- Need to find a quick, quiet space to be with yourself
- In a complaining cycle
- Working too hard
Does it matter?
Is what you are annoyed with essential for you to give away your precious energy?
Your well-being is based on how you use your energy –
|does this situation support you or drag you down?
Do you annoy others?
- We all have something that annoys another person, and when we recognize we could annoy others, we may be more compassionate with ourselves and others.
- When we are annoyed, we are irritable and will impact others and probably annoy them.
Do you want to solve your everyday annoyances, feel empowered to change situations, and respond to your responses? Learn not to be annoyed by everyday life. Do you use these thoughts as a springboard to change the situation or change your attitude about it
“Learn to sit back and observe. Not Everything Needs a Reaction.”
Women’s Group Topic
I’ve heard many times that it’s easier said than done to let go of annoyances, yet it can be easy. What if we were to think it could be easy? Would it change how we go about reducing our everyday hassles?
“To fully enjoy the ‘richness’ of our lives, we need to stop long enough to visit with ourselves.”
Other Topics You May Be Interested In
Be Like a Cat and Relax and Nurture Yourself
Do You Enjoy Your Free Time?
How to Add Fun to Your Life
Do you want to download a PDF copy of both of these books, then go to: